Two months is a long time to go between blog posts. Five days after my last post of May 22, my husband Charlie, known to many of you as the Dear Husband, died. He had been diagnosed in 2022 with congestive heart failure, a condition that was managed very well with medication until his heart simply started to wear out.
Even though I am profoundly sad at losing my husband, I celebrate the fact that we had so many bonus years together. You see, Charlie lived to be 101. When we got married in 1981, he was 56 years old and I was 30. It was the second marriage for both of us, and we are proof that love is indeed lovelier the second time around. The age difference was never an issue; he was active and vigorous in his 50s and remained so well into his 90s. He was also young at heart, which made living with him a joy.
Because of Charlie’s age at the time of our marriage, I had the reasonable expectation that we would have at least 30 years together. That would have taken him to age 86. Every year after that was a bonus year. I never dreamed he would live long enough for us to celebrate our 45th wedding anniversary! (I wrote a post in April which includes a photo of Dream Weaver, the quilt I made for him as an anniversary gift; you can read that post here.)
My twin sister Diane arrived in early May for a month-long visit and postponed her departure when it became clear Charlie’s life was coming to an end. She’s back home now but her presence before he died and for the six weeks following his passing was a great source of comfort, and I’m so grateful she was here.
Now you know why my posts have been few and far between. It wasn’t just the extra gardening chores I took on for Charlie. It was because caring for him was my number one priority. I will miss him every day for the rest of my life but I have many happy memories of our time together to sustain me.
He would be happy to know I’ll be returning to my sewing room — but I won’t neglect the garden! My promise to him was to keep our urban vegetable garden going. As a matter of fact, I picked our second tomato today, the bush beans are coming along nicely, and the herb garden is doing splendidly. The Dear Husband would be delighted.
Dawn,
I’m so very sorry for the loss of Charlie. What a beautiful life the two of you shared. This was a beautiful tribute to Charlie.
Warmly,
Nancy
Dear friend, you wrote a heartfelt post! Thank you for sharing this story with us!!
So sorry for your loss, I know what it is like to lose your husband after many years together. But, as you say he would be happy to know you are continuing to do what you love. I’m sure he’s smiling down on you from wherever he may be.
Sending hugs from the UK.
So sorry for your loss. How lucky you found such a good man. Hugs for you!
You wrote a beautifully sad post. It’s hard to imagine what will come next in our lives when we are young. Time does go on. I’m sorry for your heartache and glad your sister was there with you. Peace be with you.
Dawn, this is such a lovely post. Thank you for sharing your beautiful love story. It is truly inspiring.
Oh Dawn. I’m sorry for your loss, but I know how much you valued dear husband and how much a part of your life he will always be.
Thank you for sharing.
Hi Dawn, I am sorry for your loss. I am glad you had your bonus years and many happy memories to sustain you. Quilting and gardening will bring you solace, the quilting community is here for you.
Very sorry for your loss but so glad you had 45 wonderful years together ❤️
Dear Dawn,
What an amazing love story. I remember your joy (and his) as you described giving him the Anniversary quilt.
I’m grateful for you that you had so many good years together, but so tough to lose someone.
My condolences to you and your families. Hope the sewing room helps to provide meaningful activity and comfort.
Sincerely, Naomi ( MPS member)
Your post is so lovely, Nubs. It expresses so eloquently my most favorite thing about Charlie White and why I loved him — he made you SO happy! It was a privilege to be there with you before he died and the many weeks that followed. We are actually very lucky twins to have shared long marriages with husbands who brought us so much joy!
Dawn, sending good thoughts and prayers as you navigate this difficult time. My husband was also older than I and lived to 89. Cherish your memories each and every day. Take care.
I was saddened to learn that your Dear Husband has gained his wings. You are right though the joy and memories you made together sustain you. Those memories are like a quilt that you surround yourself with and find comfort.
Lovingly, Jo Ann
Sending a big hug and condolences. What an extraordinary gift of life – 45 years with a wonderful, loving partner. He will be sorely missed and often celebrated.
Wow, 101 years. May Dear Husband rest in peace. Hugs to you. I love reading your blog. Your quilts, well, all of your sewing pieces, are wonderful. Glad you are back sewing.
Dear Dawn, I’m so sorry to read this. I have so many wonderful memories of the time with you both in the late eighties. I’ll never forget when Charlie took me to a baseball game! It was such a great moment when we two met in the hotel last year after all these years. I wish you all the power you need!